Many people say: “Why do I have to change? It is the bully who needs to change.” In fact when the bully does not change, resentments can build in the target and that can be an unfortunate slope to be sliding down all of a sudden.
Yes, it would be most ideal if the bully would change. Did you know you can put forward the best coping skills and the bully still might not change? The real question is “How will you protect yourself from taking on unwanted, unneeded and unnecessary resentment that you are experiencing due to the frustration?”
Unfortunately, if you do not protect yourself, the bully wins. This article is about helping you to move through any resentment that might be holding you back from the joyful life you deserve. It might help you to know you are not alone. We receive emails and calls from all over the world from people experiencing bullying. It’s also not fair for you to carry this heavy load on your shoulders.
The 5 Steps to Overcoming Resentment:
Step 1: Identify
Once you’ve identified each person and the extent to which this resentment has affected you, next is to reflect upon your past, present and future.
Step 2: Reflection
Step 3: Action
Step 4: Visualize Your Future
Can you visualize your life and work situation, without the negative impact of resentment? Imagine this vision in a journal and affirm its reality daily. The vision leads the leader.
Step 5: Are You There Yet?
If you still find yourself bogged down by the negative effects of resentment, then try working through the steps once again, this time with a buddy who can listen empathetically so your thoughts can be received. Sometimes having someone ‘hear’ our story can help.
Experiencing workplace bullying is not fair. It is also not fair to have to live a life full of resentment. Also check out: Handling Workplace Bullying Resentment and Anger for additional help. Let’s make sure you are in charge of living the joyful life you deserve.
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Valerie Cade, CSP is a Workplace Bullying Expert, Speaker and Author of "Bully Free at Work: What You Can Do To Stop Workplace Bullying Now!" which has been distributed in over 100 countries worldwide. For presentations and consulting on workplace bullying prevention and respectful workplace implementation, go to http://www.BullyFreeAtWork.com
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