Bullying Tactics: Silence and Violence
By admin | June 30, 2010
Can you recall having a wonderful 2-way conversation with someone? Yes? Good. Remember that it is possible. This memory, or anchor, can serve as your reality check when you are faced with having to converse with a difficult workplace bully and you just can’t seem to connect.
Do You?
- Wonder why the bully is not “hearing you”?
- Doubt yourself, thinking “what could I do to get this person to hear and acknowledge me?”.
- Analyze your conversation, scanning for more clues as to what you could do to turn things around?
Well, Here’s What You Can Do:
Ask yourself: “Is this a respectful exchange where both parties are curious, keen, and looking to connect for a win-win relationship? If not, identify if the other party is using Silence or Violence in order to disconnect from a win-win.
Silence:
Types: Withholding, avoiding, withdrawing, masking.
What Is It? Not contributing is a means of control over a target.
Violence:
Types: Threatening, attacking, name-calling, not let you finish your statement.
What Is It? Direct and overbearing communication toward a target designed to get the target to back down or feel “less than” in order to gain control.
Learning to identify these behaviors is key to empowering yourself. Remember NAMING what is happening is crucial to putting a healthy boundary between you and the bully.
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